You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize
