ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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