I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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