you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
