whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize