Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Randomize
