I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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