What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
