If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
