Is it normal to miss your booty call?
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Randomize
