yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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