is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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