Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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