At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
