Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
He has the fingertips of a God
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