please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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