All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
i need some magic done to my vagina
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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