Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize