if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize