Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
