We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
