you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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