a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize