My hair reeks of homosexuality.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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