omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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