there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
