i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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