did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
