My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
