Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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