I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
