My nipple is on Facebook.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
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