some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
