Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
God, I missed his penis.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
