dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
