he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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