Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
