is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
