I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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