My room smells like vodka and shame
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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