You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Randomize