I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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