Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
