We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
