Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I just cut my nipple shaving
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize