is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
my shit smells like andre
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Drunk walkin through police station. America
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
