Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
