i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
