I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
