So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Randomize
